Diocesan pilgrimage offers healing for pilgrim after loss of husband

By Caty Mraz
The U.P. Catholic

“Everyone was praying for and supporting each other. It made a big difference. You could feel the warmth and love,” said Mary Lou Nelson, a pilgrim who attended the recent diocesan pilgrimage to Portugal, Spain, and France. The pilgrims visited Marian, Carmelite and Jesuit shrines in Portugal, Spain, and France from April 3-16.

This pilgrimage was Nelson’s first, though she shared that the experience had made her hope to go on other pilgrimages in the future.

Nelson was hoping to find healing on the pilgrimage, after the loss of her husband, Roger Van Beek, in April of 2023. Dcn. Steve Gretzinger was the deacon that came to visit Van Beek in hospice care. Nelson recalled that the pilgrimage had been mentioned while her husband was in hospice, and he told Dcn. Gretzinger, “Sign her up.”

Initially, Nelson was a little intimidated by the price, but decided to sign up and go after thinking about how her husband wanted her to attend. Looking back on the experiences she had on the pilgrimage, Nelson reiterated that “everyone on the pilgrimage was so supportive.”

“I grew in faith especially at the sites where Our Lady appeared,” Nelson said. She described how in some locations they toured quaint villages, enjoyed delicious local food, stayed in great hotels, and said that the camaraderie of the pilgrimage group was “wonderful—everyone prayed for each other.”

While Nelson described the entire pilgrimage as a great experience, she considers three parts of the trip to be her main highlights. The first highlight for her was praying outdoor stations of the Cross at Lourdes. What stuck with her while following the stations was that the station of the Crucifixion was depicted at the top of a mountain, and in following the other stations down the mountain, there was a cave that had a stone rolled away from the entrance.

For Nelson, visiting Normandy was another highlight. Normandy was the location of the Allied Forces World War II D-Day invasion, on June 6, 1944. She described how turning to look at hills in front of them that still had bunkers on them “really highlighted the sacrifices that had been made there.” At the cemetery in Normandy, Nelson said that the pilgrimage group walked through and said a rosary. “So many people either stood to the side or joined in with the rosary,” she said.

Nelson said that having Bishop John Doerfler celebrating the Masses and Dcns. Steve Gretzinger, Tom Foye, and Gregg St. John assisting helped make things feel more personal at the various locations. She added that having Bishop Doerfler present also allowed pilgrims the chance to see things they might not otherwise get to see, such as the Eucharistic miracle of Santarém up close.

The Eucharistic miracle of Santarém occurred in Santarém, Portugal, in the 13th century, and is still the object of national and international veneration today. Nelson said that she felt “in awe” and added, “Being told [we] could go see it, and going into the niche where it was—to be within inches of it—was so moving.” She described that blood is still present on the host.

Mass was also celebrated for the pilgrims in the grotto at Lourdes. “The water dripping, and roses blooming was a moving experience,” Nelson said.

While visiting Fatima, Portugal, pilgrims participated in a candlelight service which she described as inspiring, though she said that “walking through where the Fatima children walked—almost walking through their footsteps—was most inspiring.”

The leadership of the deacons and Bishop Doerfler on the pilgrimage was a highlight for her, as well as the overall camaraderie present amongst the pilgrims. “Everyone helped each other out and mixed well. It was like everyone was friends that you’d been with for years,” she said.
“Dcn. Steve and Jackie Gretzinger were particularly helpful on the pilgrimage, always doing little things to make people smile,” Nelson added.

Reflecting back on the pilgrimage, Nelson said that she found the healing she had sought on the pilgrimage while at Eucharistic adoration on the one-year anniversary of her husband’s passing. She said, “I got the sense he had found peace,” and shared that since then, there were “no tears.”

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